Post by Firebreath Fishslap on Dec 12, 2010 0:31:09 GMT -5
DeviantART is one of those places of the internet best described as a pit of sin and n00bs. One of the easiest places to find these n00bs is in the comments of our very own NN1, who is plagued with these insane people. Now, there is nothing wrong with fans. However, the majority of NN1's fans are the most fucking insane, most out of their minds, most brain-effected fans on the internet since the invention of Harry Potter. We're talking Enoby levels here, guys.
And then, we get comments that go above and beyond normal levels. We get comments like this. comments.deviantart.com/1/90010603/1778892773
Already off to a good start, I can tell.
So somehow people are still missing the fact that NotWE 3 was the de facto ending of the series, which was explicitly stated not only in NN1's journals but in the pages themselves.
Also, a big factor in things. WEREWOLVES. TRANSFORM UNDER THE FULL MOON. KINDA A BIG THING WITH WEREWOLVES. Especially the werewolves AS THEY ARE ESTABLISHED IN CANON. I can't think of any reason why Double D would want to transform during the day anyways. I think people would RUN AND FUCKING HIDE if they saw something like him, plus there's the fact that transforming FUCKING HURTS.
I can't think of any reason why Double D would transform during the day except as a bad plot device...
A month after halloween would set this in December. November only has 30 days, so it would take place on December 1st. Just a thought.
BECAUSE DEMANDING THE CREATOR TO DO THINGS IS A GREAT IDEA.
Wouldn't Double D's WEREWOLF HEARING mean he can hear them coming?
....
You're going to see that marquee a lot in this.
So after a mess of bad grammar and spelling, Double D ends up being caught by dog catchers who obviously can't tell the difference between A FUCKING WOLF and a dog. Double D howls for help, but none of the kids can catch up to him. The con men then take Double D to a circus that is apparently just just past the trailer park because zoning regulations totally allow that, and sell him to a "greedy mean ring master." They chain him to the floor of a "really strong cage" and pretty much make him into a new freak show.
You know, last I checked, freak shows were illegal.
You know, somehow I doubt that Eddy's Bro would be conveniently on hand to help out like he did with the zombie issue, since there doesn't even seem to be anything remotely supernatural going on here.
Also, the circus has become strangely far from the cul-de-sac. No explanation is given for this.
You think it's bad so far? Past here is the point where this "proposal" takes a dive right through the looking glass into Badficland. You see, no badfic is complete without one Mary Sue obligatory love interest OC, and Anjaline is that OC.
Okay, let's ignore our special snowflake love interest for a moment and just go over some of the other fails of this section.
First of all, it was stated AT THE VERY BEGINNING that Ed and Double D could shift at will. WHY is Double D still wolven right now? There's really no reason for him to remain in a wolf form.
He's also stated as wearing a chain collar. Now, to people who are unfamiliar with this type of collar, they're basically made to constrict airflow if a dog tugs against the leash so they won't continue to struggle, so in concept, it seems to be a good idea. However, they're also extremely easy to remove by humans, and Double D has the intellect of a human. There is no way he wouldn't be able to remove something like that.
Okay, we got that covered yet? Okay. Let's move onto Anjaline.
The first thing Anjaline does upon entering this fic is throw meat at Double D. This is literally her establishing character moment. Double D, obviously not appreciating the flinging of the meat, tries to gore the chick, but calms down upon realizing that she's a pretty young nubile female and basically gets all horny over her.
I'm gonna take this point to note that Double D is already dating Marie.
Now Anjaline suffers from one common sue trait without even having any lines. She looks like a canon character, only sexier.
The canon character copout is an oft used one when it comes to sues, particularly self insert sues. Most often it is used in regards to characters that a person LOVES but they don't want to fuck that character up for their own purposes, so they make an OC out of them.
Oh yeah, and she and Double D have only known each other for five minutes, and they already wanna fuck like bunnies.
Of course, before they can have hot werewolf on human sex, the ring master shows up and puts an end to that idea, leaving Anjaline to her work and Double D depressed beyond all belief at the idea of not getting another girl.
Again. Double D is still dating Marie.
This is really just to tell you that the other kids actually exist.
About damn time we got some actual supernatural shit in this badfic.
So apparently there's a random witch out in the woods that the ring master knows about and I guess they're buddies or something because she just hands over a VERY POWERFUL MAGICAL ARTIFACT like that, which would then give the ring master total control over Double D.
Man, this is starting to look like something out of my bad fantasies. The only way this could get worse would be if it turned out that Anjaline was really the ring master's daughter, but come on, no one would use something that cliche would they--
So Anjaline runs back to the circus, and warns Double D about the magic collar and tells him that he can't put it on no matter what. Before Anjaline can run the fuck away, some of her father's con men show up and... throw her in the dog catcher van. At the request of her own father. What a douchebag.
This really should have been mentioned a long time ago, but for some reason, it was left until now to mention this.
This is another thing that doesn't make sense. So Double D's been locked up in here, probably terrified and wanting to get the fuck out, and yet he hasn't said a word to any of the humans who aren't his special snowflake? He's just taken a vow to remain mute until he gets out? This really doesn't make much sense, and is yet another
So Double D gets dragged off and has the collar put on him, but since this is a magical collar, he definitely can't get this one off because it tightens around his neck. It then makes him completely obedient to the ring master douchebag, and he gets actual spirals for eyes because of the mind control.
So the kids from the cul-de-sac followed Ed's nose to the circus tent, and find Double D in a freakshow acting like a circus seal. He's probably making silly little seal noises while he's doing all of this, and doing treats for fish, too.
So obviously, you think the dorks would come up with some ingenious way to break Double D out and break his mind control and save the day-- oh no, Anjaline just shows up instead.
Wasn't she, like, in the van? Shouldn't those con men have been keeping a better eye on her? I mean, she did try to break their star attraction out.
So Eddy's bro is just kinda... there, and buys them front row seats to the circus, showing amazing callousness toward their friends' plight in the process.
Eventually, the show starts, and after a bunch of clowns come out, the ring master brings out Double D.
Took long enough for you asses to actually act.
Okay, I can kind of understand the clowns, but from how things were built up, the con men sounded like hardened criminals who wouldn't run for the hills from a warning shot. Also, this officially makes Eddy's bro a lunatic for firing something like this off in a crowded circus tent. Seriously, he's talking about shooting people in front of a crowd of people, who would normally be freaking the fuck out, but they're kinda just sitting there.
The kids all run over to Double D, but they can't get the collar off of him at all. Just when all hope seems lost, it's ANJALINE TO THE RESCUE AGAIN as she remembers that they need a special key to unlock it. It turns out the ring master has it, and then he shows how much more of a douchebag he is by swallowing the key.
So the kids aren't even going to fight to keep Ed, Ed and May just have passionate thoughts and don't even fight. Marie decides to choose this point to assert the fact that she exists, and yells at Double D to wake up.
Obviously, Double D's going to miraculously regain control of himself, kill the ring master, and save the day--
Oh. Well, that was anticlimatic.
So how does everyone react to the fact that Eddy just killed a man?
Eddy is fucking PROUD of this fact, and just SMILES about it. The audience cheers, because they obviously A) miraculously knew that the ring master was evil and B) were here against their will, so they're happy to see the ring master graphically die.
Oh yeah, and they get the collar off.
You know, that ambulance should really be a problem. I mean, two werewolves isn't exactly something you can just wave off.
So how does Anjaline react to her father's death?
She waves off the fact that one of her parental figures is now A BLEEDING CORPSE ON THE GROUND because he was a "jerk," and then tells Double D that he was the best friend she'd ever head in the same thought. It's nice to see the love interests in this fic have their priorities straight, especially they've only known a guy for a day.
Right after saying this, Anjaline and Double D pretty much throw themselves at each other, but since Marie is actually here to see it this time, she puts herself between the two of them and Anjaline and Marie get into an argument, and Double D doesn't really care, since he's into threesomes in this fic, I guess.
Dude. You knew this chick for ONE DAY. I know you're a horny little dog, somewhat literally, but keep your junk in your pants.
Also, I love how there's really no dramatics over the fact that Double D's safe again and stuff. It's like, "k edds safe let's go back to beating each other up nao"
Oh, and you may have noticed that Double D's pet ravens that he gained at the end of NotWE3 just don't exist in this fic. It's probably likely Ms. Bravecub just forgot they existed. After all, they're not important, just Odin's messengers and the ones who probably coulda helped him out of this mess too, nope.
This was not a request. This was a goddamn plot summary. Maybe this would have been readable if there had been any line breaks, but this had ended up just being a giant wall of text. And was it worth it to read that wall of text? Dear god no. This was nothing but a very bland self-insert black hole sue fic with a shitty OC, terrible plot, and terrible grammar. I would not even come near drawing this, for fear I would catch the stupid.
I really have no words for this thing. I was well aware of how insane NN1's fans were before I read it, but when I read this thing, I became aware of a whole new spectrum. These are the kind of fans that give fans a bad name. These are the kind of fans that spawn My Immortal and Twila.
There are no words for this. Only facepalms.
And then, we get comments that go above and beyond normal levels. We get comments like this. comments.deviantart.com/1/90010603/1778892773
Hi my name on this site is Bravecub if you what to know.
Already off to a good start, I can tell.
By the way I have a big request for you who did this ed edd n eddy werewolf comic? I was wonder if you can draw another comic where ed and double d still have their werewolf powers but can control them and easily transform during the day time too?
So somehow people are still missing the fact that NotWE 3 was the de facto ending of the series, which was explicitly stated not only in NN1's journals but in the pages themselves.
Also, a big factor in things. WEREWOLVES. TRANSFORM UNDER THE FULL MOON. KINDA A BIG THING WITH WEREWOLVES. Especially the werewolves AS THEY ARE ESTABLISHED IN CANON. I can't think of any reason why Double D would want to transform during the day anyways. I think people would RUN AND FUCKING HIDE if they saw something like him, plus there's the fact that transforming FUCKING HURTS.
I can't think of any reason why Double D would transform during the day except as a bad plot device...
And this comic takes place one month later after halloween, in November during the middle of the day at 12:00?
A month after halloween would set this in December. November only has 30 days, so it would take place on December 1st. Just a thought.
Make a comic where Double D is in his werewolf hybrid form one morning sniff around while ed and eddy are working in eddy's yard near where he is.
BECAUSE DEMANDING THE CREATOR TO DO THINGS IS A GREAT IDEA.
Double D is minding his own business when quietly two con men drive up next to double d in a dog catcher van
Double D doesn't hear the men creep up near him and capture him in a large net and throw him in the back of the truck.
Wouldn't Double D's WEREWOLF HEARING mean he can hear them coming?
....
You're going to see that marquee a lot in this.
So after a mess of bad grammar and spelling, Double D ends up being caught by dog catchers who obviously can't tell the difference between A FUCKING WOLF and a dog. Double D howls for help, but none of the kids can catch up to him. The con men then take Double D to a circus that is apparently just just past the trailer park because zoning regulations totally allow that, and sell him to a "greedy mean ring master." They chain him to the floor of a "really strong cage" and pretty much make him into a new freak show.
You know, last I checked, freak shows were illegal.
Meanwhile Ed and Eddy are gathering the kids of the neighborhood to help save Double D they even ask for help from the kankers and eddy's bro. So while the kids are collecting weapons and supples for the long trip to find Double D the ring master has started making his own evil plans for Double D and his circus.
You know, somehow I doubt that Eddy's Bro would be conveniently on hand to help out like he did with the zombie issue, since there doesn't even seem to be anything remotely supernatural going on here.
Also, the circus has become strangely far from the cul-de-sac. No explanation is given for this.
You think it's bad so far? Past here is the point where this "proposal" takes a dive right through the looking glass into Badficland. You see, no badfic is complete without one Mary Sue obligatory love interest OC, and Anjaline is that OC.
As the sun started to set Double D sat in his cage trying to remove his chain collar from his neck but isn't unable to remove it. Suddenly Double D is startled when a plate with a slab of steak on it is slammed against the cage floor by a circus worker. Double D gets on all fours lowers his head glaring at the person gives a warning growl and leaps at the cage bars trying to swip at the person without thinking twice. The person drop the broom they were holding and steps back two meters in sudden fear but doesn't run away at all. That's when Double D gets a good look at the person and quickly starts to calm down. the person who startled him was a very pretty young teenage girl around Double D's age. She looks tall, thin, and looks like a older version of Sarah same color hair and looks but with a ponytail and glasses. Double D shows some heart and apologizes to her and asks her what her name is her name is Anjaline. She gets closer to Double D knowing he really wasn't mean but scared. She cups Double D's face with her hands feeling the fur on his face while they both smiled at eachother.
Okay, let's ignore our special snowflake love interest for a moment and just go over some of the other fails of this section.
First of all, it was stated AT THE VERY BEGINNING that Ed and Double D could shift at will. WHY is Double D still wolven right now? There's really no reason for him to remain in a wolf form.
He's also stated as wearing a chain collar. Now, to people who are unfamiliar with this type of collar, they're basically made to constrict airflow if a dog tugs against the leash so they won't continue to struggle, so in concept, it seems to be a good idea. However, they're also extremely easy to remove by humans, and Double D has the intellect of a human. There is no way he wouldn't be able to remove something like that.
Okay, we got that covered yet? Okay. Let's move onto Anjaline.
The first thing Anjaline does upon entering this fic is throw meat at Double D. This is literally her establishing character moment. Double D, obviously not appreciating the flinging of the meat, tries to gore the chick, but calms down upon realizing that she's a pretty young nubile female and basically gets all horny over her.
I'm gonna take this point to note that Double D is already dating Marie.
Now Anjaline suffers from one common sue trait without even having any lines. She looks like a canon character, only sexier.
She looks tall, thin, and looks like a older version of Sarah same color hair and looks but with a ponytail and glasses.
The canon character copout is an oft used one when it comes to sues, particularly self insert sues. Most often it is used in regards to characters that a person LOVES but they don't want to fuck that character up for their own purposes, so they make an OC out of them.
Oh yeah, and she and Double D have only known each other for five minutes, and they already wanna fuck like bunnies.
She cups Double D's face with her hands feeling the fur on his face while they both smiled at eachother.
Of course, before they can have hot werewolf on human sex, the ring master shows up and puts an end to that idea, leaving Anjaline to her work and Double D depressed beyond all belief at the idea of not getting another girl.
Again. Double D is still dating Marie.
While the circus was getting ready for the big night back in the neighborhood ed uses his werewolf powers to transform to help with the search for Double D through the woods. Ed finds the scent and leads them to a bridge over a river.
This is really just to tell you that the other kids actually exist.
Meanwhile while the eds and the kids are getting ever closer back at the circus the ring master turns to an evil witch asking for some help on how to control the werewolf he captured earlier. The witch gets him a very strong and powerful metal collar to place around the werewolf's neck inabling him the power to control and have command over him.
About damn time we got some actual supernatural shit in this badfic.
So apparently there's a random witch out in the woods that the ring master knows about and I guess they're buddies or something because she just hands over a VERY POWERFUL MAGICAL ARTIFACT like that, which would then give the ring master total control over Double D.
Man, this is starting to look like something out of my bad fantasies. The only way this could get worse would be if it turned out that Anjaline was really the ring master's daughter, but come on, no one would use something that cliche would they--
While the ring master is talking to the witch he doesn't realize the his dauther who was with the Double D before over hears him and his plan for her werewolf friend.
So Anjaline runs back to the circus, and warns Double D about the magic collar and tells him that he can't put it on no matter what. Before Anjaline can run the fuck away, some of her father's con men show up and... throw her in the dog catcher van. At the request of her own father. What a douchebag.
(One of the men was tall and thin while the other was big and fat by the way)
This really should have been mentioned a long time ago, but for some reason, it was left until now to mention this.
As the two men carry Anjaline away Double D shouts at the ring master asking for him to release her at once. The ring master laughs saying to Double D that he didn't know he could talk the whole time.
This is another thing that doesn't make sense. So Double D's been locked up in here, probably terrified and wanting to get the fuck out, and yet he hasn't said a word to any of the humans who aren't his special snowflake? He's just taken a vow to remain mute until he gets out? This really doesn't make much sense, and is yet another
So Double D gets dragged off and has the collar put on him, but since this is a magical collar, he definitely can't get this one off because it tightens around his neck. It then makes him completely obedient to the ring master douchebag, and he gets actual spirals for eyes because of the mind control.
Finally the eds and the kids arrived at the circus tent to see lots of people arriving in the big main tent to see the show. The two eds and the kids looked around for Double D but couldn't find him until they saw a sign with him on it, the picture showed Double D balancing on a large ball while juggling smaller balls in his hands. Eds and the kids together said "That's Double D!"
So the kids from the cul-de-sac followed Ed's nose to the circus tent, and find Double D in a freakshow acting like a circus seal. He's probably making silly little seal noises while he's doing all of this, and doing treats for fish, too.
So obviously, you think the dorks would come up with some ingenious way to break Double D out and break his mind control and save the day-- oh no, Anjaline just shows up instead.
Awed at seeing this they decided to look around the tent for him but before ed could join them looking he saw Anjaline waving him to come help her out. She told Ed where to find the keys that were with the two con men who were asleep in the van. Ed carefully got the keys and tied the two men shoe lases together so if they awoke they wouldn't stop them.
Wasn't she, like, in the van? Shouldn't those con men have been keeping a better eye on her? I mean, she did try to break their star attraction out.
The two of them join up with the others as Eddy's bro just finished buying everyone of them a ticket so they could get into the circus. As they got to their front row seats the show started with the evil ring master welcoming everyone to the show.
So Eddy's bro is just kinda... there, and buys them front row seats to the circus, showing amazing callousness toward their friends' plight in the process.
Eventually, the show starts, and after a bunch of clowns come out, the ring master brings out Double D.
As Double D came out rounding out on a large ball while juggling smaller balls in his hands. The eds and the kids together shouted "DOUBLE D!" They all leaped out of their seats and ran into the center ring to try to rescue Double D but are stopped by the clowns and the two con men who got their shoes untied
Took long enough for you asses to actually act.
As they were about to grab the eds and the kids Eddy's bro whipped out his gun from last time and fired a warning shot into the air causing the clowns and the two con men to duck for cover then move away from them. Eddy bro shouts "Alright if anyone what to mess with me and my pipsqwick brother then you'll get a full shot of this!"
Okay, I can kind of understand the clowns, but from how things were built up, the con men sounded like hardened criminals who wouldn't run for the hills from a warning shot. Also, this officially makes Eddy's bro a lunatic for firing something like this off in a crowded circus tent. Seriously, he's talking about shooting people in front of a crowd of people, who would normally be freaking the fuck out, but they're kinda just sitting there.
The kids all run over to Double D, but they can't get the collar off of him at all. Just when all hope seems lost, it's ANJALINE TO THE RESCUE AGAIN as she remembers that they need a special key to unlock it. It turns out the ring master has it, and then he shows how much more of a douchebag he is by swallowing the key.
The eds and the kids gasped while shouting "NO!" But as the ring master laughed Ed in his werewolf form growled in anger was about to lash out at the ring master when Anjaline held him back saying "No please don't do it ed?" Ed calm down as the ring master said "Well then now that that's over with I think I'll gladly take that other werewolf off you hands children?" The kids gasped in fear at the thought of losing both eds to this evil person. As May and Ed looked into eachothers eyes sadly thinking they wouldn't see eachother anymore Marie started to really shed tears screams into Double D's ear yelling "Please Double D wake up!?"
So the kids aren't even going to fight to keep Ed, Ed and May just have passionate thoughts and don't even fight. Marie decides to choose this point to assert the fact that she exists, and yells at Double D to wake up.
Obviously, Double D's going to miraculously regain control of himself, kill the ring master, and save the day--
Suddenly there is a loud gun shot blast catching everyone's attention looking at Eddy who is holding the gun with it aimed at the ring master. Everyone stares at the center of the ring to see the ring master with a big hole his stomach. The ring master stood there with a stunned painful look on his face as he fell back dead.
Oh. Well, that was anticlimatic.
So how does everyone react to the fact that Eddy just killed a man?
Eddy runs up to a pool of blood on the ground picking up the key looking back at his bro giving him a big smile. Everyone in the audience cheered that the evil ring master was gone. As the audience were shouting happily Eddy ran up to Double D unlocked the collar and removed is finally.
Eddy is fucking PROUD of this fact, and just SMILES about it. The audience cheers, because they obviously A) miraculously knew that the ring master was evil and B) were here against their will, so they're happy to see the ring master graphically die.
Oh yeah, and they get the collar off.
The eds and the kids looked at Double D in concern waiting for him to wake up for a whole minute. Both Anjaline and Marie screamed edd's name "Double D?!" That's when Double D shook his head side to side then opened his eyes to see everyone looking at him as he smiled at them. As the ambulance drove in the eds and the kids were standing with Anjaline saying goodbye and apologizing to her for killing her father.
You know, that ambulance should really be a problem. I mean, two werewolves isn't exactly something you can just wave off.
So how does Anjaline react to her father's death?
Anjaline said "Oh its ok he was a jerk anyways and Double D you were the bestest friend I ever had."
She waves off the fact that one of her parental figures is now A BLEEDING CORPSE ON THE GROUND because he was a "jerk," and then tells Double D that he was the best friend she'd ever head in the same thought. It's nice to see the love interests in this fic have their priorities straight, especially they've only known a guy for a day.
Right after saying this, Anjaline and Double D pretty much throw themselves at each other, but since Marie is actually here to see it this time, she puts herself between the two of them and Anjaline and Marie get into an argument, and Double D doesn't really care, since he's into threesomes in this fic, I guess.
Everyone makes it home by the time midnight hits and as the kids head to bed Double D, The Kankers, and the two other eds stand together looking up at the full moon smiling. As the two other Kankers said their goodnights Marie and Double D kissed under the full moon as the two other eds sighed and went home together. After Marie finished kissing and said her goodbyes to Double D he smiled as he watched her head home. Double D sighed with releaf looking up at the full moon thinking "Something's will never change but I'm so glad that everyone joined together to rescue me from a live in the circus as a slave to that evil ring master. And most of all I'll never forget Anjaline." Double D sees her reflection in the full moon.
Dude. You knew this chick for ONE DAY. I know you're a horny little dog, somewhat literally, but keep your junk in your pants.
Also, I love how there's really no dramatics over the fact that Double D's safe again and stuff. It's like, "k edds safe let's go back to beating each other up nao"
Oh, and you may have noticed that Double D's pet ravens that he gained at the end of NotWE3 just don't exist in this fic. It's probably likely Ms. Bravecub just forgot they existed. After all, they're not important, just Odin's messengers and the ones who probably coulda helped him out of this mess too, nope.
And that's how the comic should end I think. Now you can add whatever you want them to say throughout the comic i don't mind. If you need to leave me a message just leave it at my Bravecub as a comment. Thank you for listening to my request. So PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, draw me this comic just this once? Because you draw best ed edd and eddy drawings I've ever seen!! GREAT WORK! Thanks again?
This was not a request. This was a goddamn plot summary. Maybe this would have been readable if there had been any line breaks, but this had ended up just being a giant wall of text. And was it worth it to read that wall of text? Dear god no. This was nothing but a very bland self-insert black hole sue fic with a shitty OC, terrible plot, and terrible grammar. I would not even come near drawing this, for fear I would catch the stupid.
I really have no words for this thing. I was well aware of how insane NN1's fans were before I read it, but when I read this thing, I became aware of a whole new spectrum. These are the kind of fans that give fans a bad name. These are the kind of fans that spawn My Immortal and Twila.
There are no words for this. Only facepalms.
