First Food... THEN World Domination!

[nintendonut1]

(Continued from "DON'T YOU LAUGH AT ME~!")

Okay...

If Madame Amberly's School for Evil Children taught Cortex anything, it was that one doesn't take over the world on an empty stomach. That would just be stupid.

With that oh-so-encouraging thought, Cortex walked as proudly as his limited dignity would allow him to, Holly right behind him. It was quite a walk... already he was tired. But would he let this pixie know that? OF COURSE NOT.

"..hf...sooo... here we are!!"

[shiftyPotentate]

For about the last the quarters of a mile, Holly had decided to hitch a ride on Cortex's abnormally large head, sitting on the side and looking ahead forward. She didn't have to, of course, since her wing rig ran on a nuclear battery that would outlive her by millenia, but she felt like it anyway. He didn't seem to notice her weight anyway.

She had begun to notice his exhaustion, try as he might to avoid showing it. She hopped down from his head, landing gracefully. "So this is it, huh?" she said. The various smells had wafted around her. Meats, pizza, virtually everything anyone could want. She hoped there was a salad bar. Holly generally didn't eat meat unless she had to.

[nintendonut1]

Catching his breath and hearing her voice, Cortex rolled his eyes. "Yeeees, dear," he drawled slowly as if speaking to a five-year-old. this is a MAGIC place where one can find and purchase an assortment of FOOD for consumi--"

He blinked after looking back, expecting to see her. What---where did she go??

[shiftyPotentate]

Feeling satisfied for eluding Cortex, Holly took a coin from her pocket - small in value, of course - and challenged herself to plink it right off the top of his head. She wound up and tossed the coin high - so it would seem like it came from the second floor balcony - and it arched smoothly through the air as physics dictated.

From the initial velocity and trajectory of the toss, Holly mentally approximated the landing spot... D'arvit! A few centimeters off. It'll fall right beside his head. Unless of course, he happened to lean his head just slightly to his right. But what were the odds of that?

[nintendonut1]

Considering Cortex's luck, they were higher than Holly thought.

In his attempts to find the stupid pixie, Cortex did exactly what was needed of him, and the coin bounced perfectly off his flat head.

"OW~!" he whined, swiveling around frantically. "Would you cut that out!? Wherever you are??"

[shiftyPotentate]

The "stupid pixie" in question tried her hardest to suppress a laugh, and took a quick step behind one of those tacky potted mini trees. This was almost too much fun, messing with this Dr. Cortex. Holly activated the infrared scanner in her visor to watch Cortex, and creep around when he wasn't looking.

If I've learned one thing from Artemis, she thought, it's that suddenly appearing from nowhere tends to rattle someone.

[nintendonut1]

"Oooooohhhh, FINE." Cortex had had just about enough. He was here for reason, by gum! Was the pixie needed for him to purchase lunch!? Absolutely not!!

When he turned to face the line at McDonalds, however, he began to reconsider his word choice. Purchase? What was he, a law-abiding citizen? As he casually brought his blaster out and set it to Freeze, all with a smile on his face, he figured that no, he was not.

Not a minute later, he was at the front of the line, taking his spoils in the form of a full McDonald's bag and large drink from the blinking sales clerk. As a kick in the teeth, he took the coin that had bounced on his head and put it in the tip jar before strolling away as casually as he had come.

He surveyed the contents of the bag. "Ooh! A Big Mac! With extra pickles!" The man enblocked in ice at the front of the line had good taste! Well, almost. "Dr. Pepper? Ugh, carbonated prune juice, how disgusting."

This act of evilness had picked up his mood considerably as he took a bite of his spoils. He completely forgot of the stress that... fairy had given him. For the moment, life was good.

[shiftyPotentate]

Holly felt almost angry. Odd for someone whose job requires them to go unnoticed to have such a reaction when your escort completely ignores you.

And what in the heck did he have against Dr. Pepper? she thought. For a human invention, it's not bad!

Still, the opportunity to scare the bejeesus out of Cortex presented itself. So, sly as a fox, she crept up behind him. She silently activated her wing rig and fluttered herself up to his eye level, and waited for him to turn around. With a self-satisfied grin.

[nintendonut1]

Begrudgingly slupring his drink for thrist's sake, Cortex froze right before Holly's smug grin. His lips were still latched to the straw.

"YAAAGHH!!" He threw his arms up, and up went his food into the air. Yelping, he had a choice to dive after the Dr. Pepper and the bag with the burger and fries inside. The choice was painfully obvious.

Cortex dived to his left, and the mess landed... atop his flat head. Offff course. "...how mortifying..."

[shiftyPotentate]

Satisfied with her work, Holly buzzed her wings over to the Dr. Pepper, caught it without looking, and took a drink.

"Not bad," she said. Holly flew down to Cortex. "Your head makes a perfect table~" she sung at him. So this is what it feels like to be Foaly, she thought. No wonder he's so happy and everyone else is so annoyed with that centaur.

[nintendonut1]

A small vien popped up near Cortex's left temple.

"My. Head. Is. Not. A. Table," he got out through grinding teeth, tempted to swat at the fairy and risk dropping his food, forced into a balancing act. "Now, if you PLEASE, I would like you to hand me my food so I can EAT it, please. I've--We've already wasted too much time here."