Ocean of Miracles (Kisa and Pseu)

[kisashika]

(The theme song for this thread- youtu.be/usR7mMHUhlY The Saltwater Room, by Owl City)

====>

Oh, man, what the motherfuck was that? You were just watching a tank, drinking Faygo when a big portal opened up by you.

>What was your name again, motherfucker?

Oh yeah, it was Gamzee Makara.

When that portal opened next to you, you stared into it's colorful spirals for nearly an hour before deciding to step into it- cause life threw that wonderful fucking miracle at you. But before you left, you decided to stock up on Faygo and Sopor Slime Pie and left a very confusing memo for your friends.

Once you got to wherever the fuck the portal took you, you watched it disappear into nothing. Looks like you're on your own, Gamzee.

Gamzee glanced around in a slight daze, wondering where he was at first, until he saw the waves of the ocean splashing against the shore. One of his favorite miracles to watch. So he decided to get closer and sit down on the sandy beach to lose his mind in the whimsical waters. He wasn't too concerned at the moment to learn where he was, because he didn't like understanding things.

The sea was very calm and as he gazed across it's smooth surface, he began to zone out and somewhere in the back of his mind, Gamzee thought of his Lusus.

[sleepZombie]

==> Miss your friend

That's not really hard for you to do. Of course you miss your best friend. It's been really great, having Nepeta around and even finally being able to meet your old-new friend John in person but it's just not the same without him. You've probably seen something that was really cool and turned to point it out to Gamzee only to realize that he wasn't there. Maybe he wouldn't ever be there again.

That made you even more sad.

Then again. Gamzee wouldn't want you to be upset. He'd tell you to look at all the miracles around you or something confusing, you were sure. With that hopeful thought in mind you decided that you would make a special trip out someplace. It was kind of really far away, and sometimes it got difficult for you because of your four-wheeled device, but you finally managed to make it to your destination.

The ocean.

The salty wind was familiar, which was pleasant and surprising because this was kind of an alien world to you. You couldn't go out onto the sand, your device would just get stuck and you would probably be trapped out there forever because you hadn't really thought ahead and told anyone where you were going. It made you a little more sad, because Gamzee would always help you out onto the white shore and sit you down so you could both hear the waves clearly.

You decide that staying back on the hard concrete will have to be enough, settling back and looking towards the distant shore with a sigh.

[kisashika]

===> Stop dicking around like a motherfucker.

Aww man, even though it's been a long time since you zoned out at the beach, it was about time you got around to figuring out where the fuck you where. You finally get up and look around- oh, hey, there were some buildings lined along the beach, maybe there were some motherfucking people there.

You drag your feet across the sand taking your sweet motherfucking time, 'cause the sand felt cool underneath your shoes, ya' know? The way it crunched and squished and left foot prints. It was pretty fucking cool.

===> C'mon, go ask someone where you are already.

OH. Yeah, that's what you were doing! You kind of speed up, there wasn't too much of a rush with anything you did. Once you got up to the concrete sidewalk, you decide to turn and stare off at the sea again. Because, it's like the most beautiful motherfucking miracle ever. While staring off, you pull a bottle of your magic elixir, Faygo, and bask in the motherfucking feeling of opening a new bottle.

After a bit, you finally decided to take a long drink, and let out a very unpleasing burp.

===> Alright, go find someone. Now.

Yeah, yeah, you we're just about to get to that part. You turn around and walk along the sidewalk- you saw a few... People, you guess you'd call them. But none of them looked like trolls. Humans maybe? You didn't fucking know. So you didn't get too close.

A short distance in front of you there was some four-wheeled device with someone in it. Kinda' looked like your bro, Tavros. But it couldn't be Tav, you had his head mounted in your room. You decide to go over anyway..

[sleepZombie]

Tavros sighed, resting his chin in his palm, elbow on the armrest of his chair as he looked out at the crashing water. He was remembering home, Alternia, his hive perched on the cliff out looking the sea. About Tinkerbull, which made his heart squeeze painfully so he stopped thinking about his Lusus. Actually everything he was remembering or probably could remember was really sad. He gave a shaky sigh, a faint sniffle.

Noise from behind startled him, an almost hesitant shuffling of feet. Even if Tavros had realized there were chocolaty tears in his eyes, ones that had spilled over and trailed down his cheeks, he wouldn't have had time to brush them away as he twisted around to see who was coming up at him from behind. He froze, eyes widening in surprise, jaw dropping only to twitch up into a hopeful smile. The sunset was bright, making it clear as to who it was. There was no mistaking those long spindly horns and the messy hair around them.

"Gamzee?"

[kisashika]

Gamzee stopped a few feet away when his name was said.

"Tav?" It wasn't possible, but.... There he was, alive and well- okay, not so well because he was crying and that he was in the wheelchair again, but.... It was Tavros. Gamzee stood still for a moment, mouth agape, before sprinting the rest of the way to his friend. He fell to his knees as he hugged Tavors' waist tightly.

"Aw man, i-it is you, Tav." Gamzee squeezed the other troll's waist, he couldn't contain the purple tears that started to stream from his eyes. "Tav, this motherfucker's missed you so motherfucking much." He continued to blubber incoherantly into Tavros' shirt.

[sleepZombie]

"Ye-ouf!" His words were cut short with a soft grunt as Gamzee fell to his knees in front of him and pitched forward, arms wrapping around his middle. Tavros quickly tilted his head back so he wouldn't get speared by his friends very tall, very pointy horns, and nervously reached out to lightly wrap his arms around Gamzee's neck, patting awkwardly.

"Uh. Gamzee, I missed you too! Are you alright? Because, you don't seem alright." He was more than a little disconcerted, he'd never, ever in his life ever, ever seen Gamzee cry more than maybe once. And that had been because they were young and he had missed his Lusus. It felt like that was ages ago, though.

He let Gamzee stay where he was, squirming a little bit but figuring that maybe the Capricorn needed this. It felt good for him, too, anyway. Being able to know that his best friend was actually right HERE, able to touch and smile at and joke with. He absently gave soft little pats at the back of Gamzee's neck, which turned into minute little pets as he tried to calm his friend down from whatever fright or sadness had overcome him. "I'm here, though. So. You don't have to miss me! And I am not missing you! So, uh, feel better?"

[kisashika]

After a few moments, Gamzee pulled his face away from the other troll's shirt and wiped it, smearing his clown makeup. Sniffling, Gamzee looked up at his long lost friend. "Y-yeah, you're right, Tav. You're fucking here now, and you're motherfucking alive. It's the most beautiful miracle ever, man, ever. Honk." There were still a few stray purple tears on his face, but Gamzee couldn't care less.

"And man, this motherfucker is fine- more than fine. Never been fucking happier." Gamzee gave a big grin to his wheelchair-bound friend before stepping back some to stand up. The emotion he was feeling at the moment was a slurry of happiness, sadness, joy, and whatever the pies did to his head. He cleaned his face the rest of the way, almost wiping all of his makeup off.

"But, man, Tav-bro. Going to be completely fucking honest with ya', this motherfucker's got no fucking idea how you're here, but.... Whatever...." He let out a long sigh and sat cross-legged on the ground.

[sleepZombie]

"Well, I don't really, uh, know how I got here either. Or I do, but, I don't really understand." Knowing that his best friend was alright was a relief. Tavros hadn't realized that he was so upset that Gamzee had been so upset until the lanky troll began to wipe the tears away from his face. There was grease paint all over his sweater front and it was getting all over Gamzee's hands and...

"What happened?" The sharp intake of breath was loud between them. Tavros half lifted his hand, not that he could actually reach the distance that his useless legs put between them, and motioned towards the three scratches across his best friend's face. His expression was one of extreme dismay. Who would hurt Gamzee? He couldn't think of anyone that didn't like him in some way.

Tavros felt like. Like maybe it was something bad. He was a clearly afraid just to think of what could have happened, evidenced by the way he anxiously fingered at his sweater, tugging at the fabric where it was messy with Gam's face paint.

[kisashika]

"Uhh.... What?" Gamzee stared at Tavros for a second before it really clicked what the other had asked- the scars. The memory was still fresh in his mind, the pure and utter madness of that day. His somewhat goofy smile faded away into a deep frown as the images flashed in his mind- finding Tavros impaled, Equius' blood on his hands, Nepeta's face.... The things he'd painted....

"It...." He looked up at his friend and was hesitant to explain, he didn't want Tavros- one of the best things to ever happen to him- to be afraid of him. Gamzee pulled another Faygo bottle from his captchalouge and took a drink. "It's kind of a long motherfucking story, bro...."

Tavros looked so nervous about asking and Gamzee was never one to not answer a question. "You see, a while ago, a motherfucker ran out of motherfucking pie and went all crazy and shit." He flailed his arms a bit. "And it took my best friend for fucking ever to make me chill out. But, anyway, when I was going crazy I kinda' fucking killed Equius. And turns out, Nep was watching me choke him and kinda' went crazy on me."

He took a deep inhale, catching his breath before continuing. "So this motherfucker grabbed her fucking hand and broke it then used her motherfucking claws to scratch my face." He stopped talking to take a drink. "And then all of this other shit happened that's all a big fucking blurr of blood and stuff that's all confusing and shit."

After explaining more than was probably needed, Gamzee just stared off, trying to block the gruesome images from his memory. "And, uh.... Sorry, if that fucking scares you, Tav.... If it means anything, I feel bad about it.... " He lowered his head, keeping from making eye contact with Tavros.

[sleepZombie]

Tavros listened to everything with a growing look of horror. He. Equius. And Nepeta!? But she had been with him just a bit ago. And. Quickly he closed his mouth, which had gone slack in his stunned surprise. The Taurus swallowed nervously, his throat suddenly very dry.

"It. It scares me. A lot." His breathing was fast, his bi-valve vascular system thumping hard against his chest, and his body and hushed voice were wrought with tremors. He licked his lips and fidgeted with the hem of his shirt, unsure of what else to say as the painful silence stretched between them. His mind was completely reeling with all that he'd just been told.

For a guilty second, he wondered if maybe this was not the Gamzee he knew. If maybe it was a doomed Gamzee. His Gamzee would never, ever hurt anyone. He was goofy and funny and liked to honk and look at colors and drink faygo and slam with him.

And then he threw those notions aside. Because Gamzee was still, and always would be... Gamzee. Terrifying or not. Hesitantly he scooted forward in his chair, trying to get closer without completely sliding out in an ungraceful heap. For not the first time in his life he found a sudden flare of frustration at his stupid useless legs, if only they worked. Then he could... But no, they did not move. He continued to ease forward, working his way out of the chair until he lowered himself down to sit in front of Gamzee. Tavros hunched forward, ducking his head down and moving so that he was leaning into Gamzee's line of sight, his own eyebrows drawn upward nervously.

"But. You're okay now, right? Maybe. Things happened, that, uh, I don't know about. Or something..." He lifted his arms a little, wanting to move forward to hug Gamzee; usually he would have hesitated and waited (and hoped) that the Capricorn would understand and initiate the hug. Instead of waiting he shyly wrapped his arms around Gamzee's shoulder and leaned in, turning his head to the side so his cheek rested against his shoulder, one long horn brushing over it. "If you say you're okay now, I believe you, and. I'm really glad. And I'm glad you're, uh, here!" He considered offering to slam about how they were feeling right now but... it might not be the most appropriate thing at the moment. They would totally have to do that later, though.

[kisashika]

Gamzee was at a complete loss, he knew Tavros would be afraid of him, but when the other voiced his feelings.... It had hurt him more. He just stared at the ground, trying to keep his composure, which was going well, until Tavros got out of his chair and joined him on the ground.

He stared at the Taurus as he spoke, there was so much he had left out of the story that he wanted to say- especially about how he had come to terms with the red feelings he held for the other Troll. But Gamzee was afraid to tell Tavros about them now, because he felt the strain on their friendship already. Then Tav spoke again.

"Yeah.... I'm better now 'cus of Karkat. And a motherfucker promised to never fucking let that happen again." After a hesitant moment, Gamzee hugged Tavros back, relieved that their relationship wasn't completely destroyed. Though, there was something nagging at the back of his mind, about his flushed feelings, and when Tavros rested his head on his shoulder, Gamzee felt his face heat up a bit.

"Thanks for believin' in me, Tav-bro.... Not somethin' I hear every motherfucking day...." He hugged the other tighter. "And I'm glad you're alive- it's a real fucking miracle, bro. 'Cus you were gone, but now? This motherfucker ain't letting it fucking happen again."

[sleepZombie]

Tavros returned the squeeze with one of his own, even though it wasn't nearly as tight as Gam's. Finally he let go, leaning back and found himself again metaphorically smacked in the face again with something horrifying. "I was gone?" His voice squeaked up into an alarmed pitch, his throat tightening at the notion. Who could have...

Like a cold punch to the stomach he decided he probably guess who it could have been. He trembled, blanching as he thought of her. It was a horrible, confused jumble of emotion whenever he thought of her name. One he didn't want to think about. Ever.

He took in a sharp breath, suddenly desperate. Desperate to move away from these really terrifying and alarming thoughts. And he suspected that it probably wasn't fair to Gamzee to make him not talk about something that was obviously so alarming to him but it was really distressing to himself as well. If he could help it, he would dodge those topics as much as he could. He would also do all he could to distract Gamzee from these sad, horrible memories. It was the only way he could think to help him.

"Hey! Let's, uh." He faltered, trying to think of something else to do. Something fun! His face lit up as the best idea ever struck him and he turned eagerly to Gamzee, reaching out to put a hand on his shoulder, the other pointing out towards the sea. "The sun is already really far down. And. I know we always watched the sunrise. But. Maybe we could finish watching! Like we used to, back at home, remember?"

He reached back for his four-wheeled device, grabbing at the arm rests and beginning to hoist himself up. While his legs had atrophied and lost all muscle his arms had become stronger, the muscles cordy and lean beneath his skin. "Or, you know, we could, uh, stay right here. Since it'd be hard to, push my four-wheeled device on the sand."

[kisashika]

You know, that sounded like a great idea. The best idea he'd heard in a long time. He had missed doing those little things with his best bro- watching stuff and throwing down the sick rhymes.

Gamzee stood up and put his bottled elixir away, smiling. He was really happy that Tavros was cool with everything. "Yeah!" His smile widened as an idea struck him. "Nah man, if we're gonna' watch that motherfucking beauty, we gotta' have front row seats." Gamzee leaned over and placed an arm behind the Taurus' back and another under his legs, lifting him gently out of his chair.

"Cus if we're all the way fucking back here, it just ain't the same, ya' know?" He started to walk out to the shoreline, grinning.

[sleepZombie]

"Oh. Oh, Gog."

Gamzee had done this enough times in the past that he shouldn't be surprised by it, yet he still found himself startled as he felt the Capricorn take hold of him and lift him up. Tavros flailed for a few seconds before he wrapped both arms around Gamzee's neck and held on tightly.

"O-Okay, just. Don't drop me." He also knew that Gamzee wouldn't drop him. It was kind of surprising how much strength was in those wiry, thin arms. He looked up at his best friend as he began carrying him out towards the shore, excited that he'd be able to feel the sand beneath his fingers again and hear the waves roll and lap at the sand that was turning different shades of orange in the setting light.

In fact he seemed to be so excited about it he felt little flutters in his stomach, watching his friend as he looked ahead of him to see where he was stepping, that goofy, dazed, glazed smile on his face. Tavros felt his face warm with a sudden wash of joy and carefully rested his cheek on Gamzee's shoulder like he had before, hiding his face against his friend's neck so he couldn't see the sepia tones that had colored him. He was just so happy, even if it was a little embarrassing.

"Oh! Nepeta is here. Uh. She's alive. And, uh, the John-human. But you didn't really try to, uh, troll them, did you? We went shopping, to get some new clothes. We should get you some, too! So, you have more to wear than just, uh, these. If you'd want." Tavros had to admit, he felt pretty nice in his comfy sweater, new pants, and shoes. "There is a lot to see here, or so it seems."

[kisashika]

"Chill, bro. A motherfuckers' got this." Gamzee comforted his friend, adjusting whenever Tavros held onto his neck. "If I didn't, you wouldn't be in my fucking arms, now would you?" He grinned as they crossed the sandy beach.

He sort of zoned out while he walked; it felt nice to be able to carry his best bro around again. It felt even better because they had all the time they wanted to just hang, and chill, and do whatever they wanted again. Gamzee really did miss Tavros, to the point that it hurt just to see his head hanging round his room. But, that didn't matter at the moment; what did matter was Tavros was here, now, in his arms, and it was the greatest thing ever.

Gamzee was snapped out of his thoughts when the other Troll spoke again. "New clothes?" He was confused at first; what was wrong with his current ones? They weren't dirty or ripped, were they? "Oh! You mean like to fucking change into once in a while? Well, yeah, sure. That sounds pretty motherfucking sweet, bro."

Wait. He said Nepeta? But.... "Nep is alive, too? Well geeze, it's almost like this motherfucker up and died or somethin'. And she's fine and stuff?" That was good, he supposed. Maybe she didn't know about him killing her like Tavros.

Once they got close to the water, Gamzee stopped and stared for a bit before gently setting his friend on the warm sand. "Ah, here we go- best motherfucking seats in the house." Gamzee sat down right next to Tavros and slung an arm over his shoulders.