Time For Some Well-Deserved Naps

[sleepZombie]

When Gamzee and Nepeta were both silent for a little while, Tavros leaned up on both his elbows as well, looking side-long at John without turning his head. If he turned he might smack Gamzee in the neck with one of his horns and then the other would probably rip into the pillows and just... yeah he kept still.

Besides... he didn't really want to look at anyone, instead regarding the far wall with a sad sort of melancholy. He could imagine why Gamzee might not want to speak up, there was more than just having had his lusus die... he'd lost his lusus far before that unfortunate event. And maybe Nepeta was feeling a little extra sad as well. She and Ponce had always gone out together on adventures, exploring the wild free outside and depending on each other.

Though... Tinkerbull had been no less dear to him. After Aradia had died... he'd been the only other friend he'd had to talk to, really, aside from Gamzee. And Gamzee was sometimes busy or zoning out.

"Uh, yes. Our lusus were, the ones who took us in after we left the cave of trials. Schoolfeeding us and, generally taking care, unless they were, uh, kind of a nuisance themselves. I think, Karkat's lusus gave him a lot of trouble but... I am also very sure that, it didn't mean he cared for it any less."

Tavros' hands squeezed together, wishing he had the plush of Tinkerbull that Kanaya had made for him. "Uhm. Tinkerbull, was mine. He was, pretty great..." He felt into quiet thought, remember the way that the little fairy bull had died... crushed beneath his own four-wheeled device because of his clumsiness.

[shiftyPotentate]

Nepeta frowned. She could tell where John was going with this. His lusus guardian, the tall one. She figured it would be good to share about her lusus, though it did hurt her a little to remember.

"My lusus, Pounce de Leon... she took me even though I was one of the worst purrformers... But she raised me, taught me how to hunt, to live, to care fur myself... she was a very kind lusus, and I liked her very much..." She closed her eyes, remembering the image perfectly. When it came to bad experiences, one always has perfect memory. "Then... one night I came back to my hive... only my hive was gone... the cave had collapsed... and Pounce..."

She sniffed, choking back a tear and some fluids she didn't know were gathering.

"...was gone."

She shook her head a little. This was supposed to be about John and his feelings, not hers! She felt a little frustrated she'd talked so much about her own problems.

[nintendonut1]

John's heart clenched a little and he shut his eyes painfully as Tavros and Nepeta both recounted their own memories. Gamzee was oddly quiet, and he could probably guess why pretty easily. It seemed all of them had gone through their own losses, which made him feel both a little bit better but a lot worse at the same time.

He kept having to remind himself that as painful as this was, it was needed. They had to do this, they had to get it out or it would continue to haunt them.

So, as much as it hurt him to do so, he spoke when he sensed the others had gone quiet. "My dad was... he was the best. Sometimes I didn't feel that way, because of those stupid clowns and all the cake, but... but..."

His throat tightened and he swallowed, and his eyes began to sting. "He kept me safe... he couldn't be home all the time, b-but he'd leave me gifts and notes, he did his damn best, I know that now, but...!"

Finally, a soft sob escaped him, and he curled a bit into Nepeta tensely, and in a considerably weak voice, "...I couldn't save him..."

[kisashika]

It seemed everyone was spilling their emotions about their Lusi, but Gamzee kept quiet.

He hadn't cried over the old goat since he died, but there was still that hollow, helpless feeling within him knowing that SeaGoatDad was gone. The old Goat was hardly around after he'd grown into a troll and out of his wriggler stage- and after that, the Goat went out to sea and came only once in a while to warn Gamzee about not going into the waters. Even as he grew, ate sopor slime, and made friends- played Sgrub, grown stronger, he still felt like a helpless wriggler at times.

So, Gamzee kept what hopeless emotions he'd felt towards his abandoning Lusus to himself and laid back down on the bed. Not bothering even to speak- if the others wanted to spill their grievances, he'd happily lend an open ear.

He looked towards the others, a small, forced smile- he hoped it wasn't too obvious that it was- and listened.

[sleepZombie]

He felt the shift of the bed behind him, but decided that... perhaps Gamzee needed a moment to himself. Tavros cared for him a great deal but he figured that sometimes that meant giving some space when needed. He did reach up to catch Gamzee's hand carefully in his, though, holding onto it.

And then John was crying. It was a little startling to see the clear fluid coming from his eyes, but the sad sounds that escaped him definitely confirmed that he was upset. The Taurus bit his lip, brows furrowing. He... absolutely did not know what to say.

"U-Uh."

[shiftyPotentate]

Nepeta let John get it all out, holding onto him tightly as he needed her. She heard everything he needed to get out, and only then did she respond.

"It's hard losing a lu-- ... guardian, John," she said, with a light stroke to the back of his neck. "You feel like you're all alone, because a part of you goes with them... They raised you, protected you, taught you... and you feel broken without them...

"But you don't have to feel completely lost. Because I think that even though a part of you goes with them... part of them goes with you... You'll always have their influences, their memory, their guidance. Your dad loved you very much, John, I can tell. He'll always be with you, and he'll always be proud of you."

Nepeta surprised herself a little. The words just kind of flowed forth from her. Maybe that was Pounce talking, in a way. She smiled and just let it happen.

"He would be proud to know what a brave human you grew into... and at how many friends you've made."

[nintendonut1]

"I looked all over for him...!" John sobbed, proceeding to do just as Nepeta was there for and get out the despairing frustrations. "I was so close, too many times, I really wanted to show him and bond with him just a little more but, but when I found him, god, there was just so much blood--!" He violently trembled. "A-and I couldn't even AVENGE him, Jack just up and fucking STABBED me and...and...!"

Finally, words failed him, and he descended into soft wailing and thick sobs. He hadn't cried this hard in a very long time.

Some time passed before John began to calm down, descending into sniffs and hiccups. The tears kept rolling down his face, of course, especially as Nepeta spoke so soothingly. His heart wrenched again, though it was the good kind, the kind that reminded him that she was right, that Egbert Senior would always be with him, in his thoughts, in his memories, in his heart. And yes, he had friends to turn to, to help guide him through his next stages. Dad had taught him how important it was to make those friends.

"I..." he sniffed, glancing up between the three trolls through drenched eyes. "Guys, I... th-thank you. Thank you so fucking much, god."

He was speaking less to the three of them specifically and more to everyone he knew, every friend he made, hoping, somehow, they would grab the sense of graditude.

[kisashika]

Gamzee jerked up when John started crying, feeling extremely bad for the human. John had every reason to be sad about the loss of his lusus, because he'd lost his in such a horrible way- at least the trolls got to spend a bit of time with theirs when the game started.

The fake smile was gone and replaced by a mournful frown, if his hands weren't occupied at the time, Gamzee would have reached over and patted John on the shoulder. But, Nepeta seemed to have the cuddling and loving on covered, it was her job anyway.

When the burst of crying had settled down to quiet sobs, Gamzee turned his body to where he could reach over to John, careful not to bump or hit Tavros' horns.

"Hey man, that's what friends are for, right?"

[sleepZombie]

"R-Right." Tavros agreed quietly with Gamzee. He was a bit shaken by the intensity of John's tears, releaved that he had calmed down and seemed to have found some kind of comfort - either in their presence or because of some remembered thing.

He wondered if he felt lonely... being the only human there who had witnessed the end of the world, who'd fought shale imps and ruby ogres, who had died more times than should really be possible. Who knew what it was like to feel so desperate and hopeless and to have the fate of everything, everything on his shoulders...

It was hard being a Sburb or Sgrub player... it was hard and only they understood.

Following some unknown urge, an almost need, Tavros reached up to grasp Gamzee's arm that still held tight around him, shuffling over carefully so as not to beam anyone. His other arm was stretched out, reaching with an almost desperation until he was able to grasp over Nepeta's hand. That done he felt a bit of the unfamiliar and strange urgency die down. They were all four connected now, linked in the strange little bubble of melancholy that had descended over them.

Heaving a sigh his eyes began to drift again, caught up in the warmth of his matesprit curled against his side and the warmth of his friends nearby. He snuggled closer to Gamzee and drowsed, not really having anything he might be able to say.

[shiftyPotentate]

This time Nepeta didn't have any words. She simply reached up and embraced John tight, holding his head softly against her shoulder and rubbing his back with her hands. Her tail too stroked lightly against his hip. It was about time for the sadness and crying to be done anyway. Jade was going to be there soon and she wanted everyone to be happy and all better by then.

May as well nicely tease John about that a little.

"Hey, John?" she started. "I think I know someone who might pawssibly be able to cheer you up some more. But you have to be in control when she arrives, okay? She should see us all being happy, I think." She nuzzled his face softly. That would do it, she hoped!

[nintendonut1]

John took a moment to soak in the feeling of his friends embracing all around him, and the pain in his chest slowly ebbed away. A last sniff and rub at his nose, then, "S-sorry to bring down the mood, I just.... really, really needed that, whew."

And already he was beginning to feel a lot better. With the tensions inside him released, sleepiness found him again, and he yawned hugely, perking up only a little at Nepeta's words. "Oh, yeah?" he smiled slyly in return, not bothering to ask who and letting Nepeta keep her little secret. "Hehe, can't wait. Mmn..."

He wiggled back under the covers, trying to get comfortable. "Sorry I had to go and inturrupt our--(yawn)--nap."

[kisashika]

Pulling his hand back from John, Gamzee reached down and pulled the blankets up that had been thrown askew from their collective moving, and set them across everyone's shoulders, where they were all comfortably nestled underneath the fluffy comforter. He then wrapped his arm around Tavros, nuzzling back into his matesprits messy hair- it still smelled of the nice hair products from the salon.

As everything seemed to calm down, Gamzee felt the pull of drowsiness tug his eyes closed and he fell into a light sleep.

[sleepZombie]

Things were settling down which was really good. Even better was how Gamzee was lightly tugging the blankets up around them and holding onto him. Tavros managed to hold out just long enough to hear the gentle breathing of his matesprit as he drifted to sleep, and he spent a moment just watching him, smiling in wonder at his luck.

Even John and Nepeta drowsed off to sleep before he finally closed his eyes.

---- Some time in the future (but not too far) ----

Jade double checked the instructions that she'd been given and the address that showed on the sign post and... yup! This was it! The kitty troll...er. Wow Jade had completely forgotten to ask her what her name was. AC, was all she knew her by. ANYWAY. At least she was in the right spot!

Cautiously Jade went to the front door, giving a light knock. No one answered... so she knocked again a bit harder. The second time she found the door actually swung forward a bit, and she reached for the knob and pushed it the rest of the way open. Either someone was expecting her or she was about to walk into some kind of risky situation.

Stepping inside she looked around, her specugoggles turned off so she could see the actual room instead of program apps. The area was pretty bare, obviously this was an apartment that no one had moved into yet. "Helloooo?" Stepping forward softly she peeked into a nearby room and promptly found what she was looking for.

All piled in a heap on a bed.

And looking really adorable.

She suppressed the urge to give a squeak of giddyness and instead carefully walked around to the edge of the bed. The four occupants had become a tangle of limbs (like tangle buddies AWWW!). Close to the edge was someone with dark hair like her's, and pale skin like her's.

She'd seen him before, through her goggles, but it was so much more different being able to actually stand right there with him. For a few seconds Jade just watched before finally reaching out and lightly shaking the shoulder of her ectobrother, John.

[nintendonut1]

This time John managed a full, dreamless sleep, nightmares no longer plaguing him. So he was just a little less sleepy when he was very lightly shaken awake.

"Mmmnpuhghm," he mumbled, scrunching his eyes and smacking his lips. His movements to turn over were slow and deliberate, and he pawed for his glasses, which were far up above his head on the matress. Jade grinned, taking the glasses into hand and sliding them on his face for him, to which he rapidly blinked his eyes into focus.

John gave pause upon seeing the girl above him, the dark long hair, the rounded glasses, the buck-toothed grin, and all. He had never seen her face before, and yet...

"J...Jade?"

He didn't wait for a response, because he knew, he knew deep down, and a wide smile spread across his face. "Jade... oh my god, JADE!!" Drowsiness left him immediately as he quickly sat up and threw his arms around her, pulling her into a warm hug. "Oh god, sis, you made it, oh god...!"

[shiftyPotentate]

Nepeta had happily drifted off to sleep with her friends, but shortly she was awoken by John's reaction. When she realized what was happening, she smiled and sat up beside John.

"Like my surpurrise?" she asked with a fanged grin, ruffling John's hair a little. She let the two of them have their hug, and when John and Jade finished hugging, Nepeta explained.

"While you were asleep earlier your lunchmuffs made a beep! Jade was trying to talk to you so I talked to her fur you and told her to come here!" She felt especially proud of herself for orchestrating this touching moment.

In case Gamzee and Tavros hadn't been woken up, she very gingerly shook them awake as well.